I was in a coffee shop recently, where I had an hour to spare to indulge in my favourite pastime.
No, not that one! How dare you!
While sipping my skinny latte, I discreetly listened-in to conversations and observed people’s behaviour, a habit which has always been grist to a comedian’s mill.
Not that I know any comedians who collect grist or live in a mill. But I remember reading that the late Jim Bowen lived in a converted railway station.
He hired builders to knock down the station tea-room and shorten the platform and in a matter of weeks it had come to a halt.
That’s a joke only regular train travellers and train spotters who can read words of more than one syllable may get.
The coffee shop I was in was a branch of a well-known chain and around me people were tucking into chocolate biscuits, paninis, pannatone’s with real butter etc.
Delicious – but not particularly healthy.
Because the counter, decor, tables etc. were identical to every other branch of this chain, until two nurses walked in, I’d momentarily forgotten that it was inside a hospital.
I was waiting for visiting hours to start so I could pop up to the ward to see an old friend who was in for a minor procedure.
‘Procedure’ sounds so much pleasanter than ‘operation’ doesn’t it?
From my observations, I find it ironic that the NHS tell us to eat healthily so we’ll be less of a burden on them in later years, yet they’ve allowed this coffee shop chain to open branches in hospitals all over the country.
While the food they serve is always delicious and of top quality, wouldn’t it be better for hospitals to open cafes that serve healthy salads, fresh fruit and meals with low salt content rather than cheese and ham toasties, chocolate chip muffins and sugary hot chocolate drinks?
The chip shop closes in five minutes . . .